Short answer…yes!

As I get close to launch day, there are a wealth of emotions running through my head. This launch is very different than my first in a lot of good ways. For Knightess, I didn’t tell anyone that I wrote a book. I was too terrified of letting people read it, as silly as it sounds. Why publish if you aren’t going to let people read? When the launch party, that I’d invited maybe five people to, leaked onto Facebook compliments of of my sister, I was like “NOOO! Now everyone will know my pen name!” No joke, I was so stressed I almost told her to take it down. She convinced me it was fine, and she was right. The friends and family (and even a few strangers) that showed up on release day were so supportive. Best of all, they actually liked my book. As those comments came in, I held my head a little higher and actually told people, “Hey, I wrote a book.”

Knightess was a twenty year project, born in study hall in high school, and transformed as I grew up. I was, and still am, so emotionally invested in that work. There are so many layers to it. I knew it deserved to see the light of day, not just sit in my closet forever, being endlessly edited. I knew I had to find a point to call it quits, and let it be what it was, even if it was imperfect. Writers are notorious perfectionists by the way. The thing is, the story is never done, unless you let it be.

That mental shift towards completion is what allowed Lady of the Tournament to be born. I wanted to write something in which I fixed all my mistakes from Knightess. Better research, better understanding of point of view and how to manipulate it, and better depth to my characters. From what advance readers are saying, I think I succeeded. That gives me confidence, which is good, because I told people about this book. Lots of them.

I am less scared and far more excited for this release. Not only did I fix things in the writing of the book to build my confidence in it, but all of you that read Knightess and shared how you liked it have confirmed that maybe I do write stuff worth reading. And if you weren’t too scandalized by that first book, I think you’ll be okay with this one. It helps that maybe I trimmed some of the sexual content (I let my GRANNY read that…and the church pastor!). However, this book has its own kind of intensity, and you all might want to throw it at me for a whole other reason.

And that leaves me with my biggest stressor…I have fans now! I can’t let you down! Yikes! I certainly hope that I have risen to the occasion and provided something you find enjoyable. Your excitement it catching to me. We’re going to have some fun with this book. Then it will be back to work until I can finish the beast that is book 3 of the series. After all, you might string me up by my toenails if I make you wait too long.

I spoke with a fellow author about whether these fears and the roller coaster of emotions is normal. She assured me they are. She gave me such a beautiful answer I am going to post it here in its entirety. Its a good thing Melissa Roos is already a published author, because she’s a heck of a writer.

The first time I let anyone read my book, to say I was hesitant is an
understatement. I was literally scared to death! I felt like I was handing over a piece of my soul. Praying they would love it, the whole of it, and not just bits and pieces. I
wanted them to love everything from the concept of the book to the title. I wanted
them to love my main characters and yet in turn despise the appropriate ones too. I
wanted the reader to love every scene, every chapter, every paragraph, and every
word. I knew in my mind this was a tall order and was setting myself up for
disappointment but I couldn’t help it or control it, my heart wanted what it wanted.

It was almost like being a first-time mother all over again when someone asked to
hold my baby for the first time. I had spent months and months protecting and
nurturing this tiny bundle of your deepest, and most intimate thoughts, and now I’m
just handing it over, putting it in someone else’s hands. Would they love it as I did?
Would they protect it? Would they understand it? Would they see what I saw? Would
they feel what I feel when they read the words? Would it paint the same picture in their minds as it does in mine? So many unknowns. So many uncertainties. But in the end, I was desperate for someone else to love it as much as I did. So I had to let it go and trust someone to read my story. Because what was the point if no one else ever lifted the cover or read the first sentence?

Melissa roos, author of you can hide and more